Abstract
This personal essay describes the author's theoretical and methodological journey in her quest for understanding of wholeness as a basic concept of the discipline of nursing.She asserts that wholeness, seen as pattern and meaning of the life process, is not amenable to external measurement and control, but is learned from within by a hermeneutic dialectic process with clients. The emphasis on the evolution of undivided wholeness is consistent with a unitary-transformative paradigm of the discipline.